New Year's Resolutions

#1. I resolve to eat, drink, and be merry as I have been given this one life and I will live it to its fullest without judgments or limitations

#2. It is my resolution to purchase fabulous shoes and wear them with great pride

#3. I resolve to keep up the good fight against The Sinister Organization of Educators at the Christian School

#4. I resolve to be in a better physical condition in an effort to do battle with the SOE cause lets face it… this body ain’t getting any younger

#5. I make a resolution to start cooking delicious and nutritious meals for my family just as soon as I resolve to go to culinary school

#6. I resolve to ship the children off to their grandparents as much as possible so that I am able to fulfill resolution #1

#7. And I resolve to taunt, torment and embarrass said children at every opportunity given under my watch… (I just don’t feel I did enough of that in 2008)

#8. I make a resolution to NOT add #11 to the Weden Family Pet Menagerie (this one is key and will be extremely difficult)

#9. And finally, it is my resolution to continue to keep people guessing, push the envelope and play the devils advocate only because someone has to frolic on the other side of the fence, and I quite enjoy it over here

Wordless Wednesday

FINALLY!

So this is what we’ve been up to this holiday season:

It's a BIG one, so please keep all arms, legs, and small children inside while the post is in motion...

On Sunday, December 21st we joined some long time friends of ours for a delightful champagne brunch on the Queen Mary.

After the brunch we took a mini tour of the ship. Michael was thrilled…

After the tour it was out to the bar and then a little more exploration of the old girl! She has a bit of a saucy side that most don’t know about… but the Queen and I have a history, we have a mutual respect and understanding of how things should be, and I’d like to share this with you...

Yes, there’s nothing like good friends, drinks and a cheeky old ship to bring you out of a holiday funk, and I couldn’t have asked for a better day! Thank you again to Jim, Jean & CAM for bringing the Christmas spirit to this Grinch!

On Monday, December 22nd Travis took the kids down to Nana’s house. This gave me approximately 8 hours over two evenings to get ALL the wrapping, bows, and tags done. Focused and determined I spread out all the wrapping accoutrements across the family room floor; prepared my stack of holiday DVD’s and dove in! To my shock and dismay I found that the 8 hour allotment was not sufficient and on Wednesday morning I was back at it! This time I was up against the housekeeper who was swiftly moving from room to room! I knew I had to be out of there before she descended upon me with mop and duster! With only minutes to spare, I put the last present under the tree, stashed all the paper & bows, and retreated to the sanctity of my bedroom for some brief R & R before Nana returned the children.

12/24/2008 So this brings us to Christmas Eve…

First Santa Travis surprised us with this charming little ball of fluff! This is “Roxie” aka “Poof,” and she is #10 in the Weden menagerie of pets. She is goofy and feisty and has two extra toes, and fits in with our special brand of weirdness just purrrrfectly!

YES Her Nails Are Red! Helloooooo... MY cat!

And then we were ready forTonny's house:

Christmas Eve at Tonny's....

Oma, Mom & Dad are Styling!

Cousins through & through....

Can someone please get King Farouk a palm frawn & some grapes?

12/25/08

And despite some doubts, Santa did make a stop at the Weden house...

And everyone was filled with Christmas Joy!

But It's STILL not over!

So off we traveled to my parents for a delicious Christmas breakfast, and yes... MORE presents!

Danielle is such a helful little elf!

("helful" Freudian slip! Clean up aisle five! Actually... it does fit, I think I'll leave it)

Brian & Jadie

Heff had better watch his back!



And we finally closed our holiday festivities with a trip to Nana & Archie's for dinner & MORE PRESENTS!!!!

When we asked the children if they had a a good Christmas, Michael summed it all up for everyone...

I hope all of you had a magical Christmas... And be sure to have a safe and Happy New Year!

With love,

Travis, Lesley, Brian, Danielle & Michael

Miss Me?

No, I didn’t fall off the face of the earth… I simply got sucked into the joyful holiday abyss know as Christmas, and I had to go into temporary shut down mode for fear of merriment overload.

I still need to get my pictures in order, but tune in tomorrow and I'll bring you up to speed on The Fabulous Weden Five! :)

Flashback Friday!

To any of you that have ever had the pleasure of losing your money to me at the game of Texas Hold 'Em.... You are well aware I do not bluff. That being said...

Breakfast is served!

Mmmmmm....




You really just have to go for it!

Here it comes!

Feelin' gooooooood!

SUGAR RUSH!!!!!!

And now it's time to get dressed and get this boy ready for school! OH! And the "Flashback" part of this Flashback Friday? Well, those will all belong to Michael! He may even have some FlashForwards! (haha)

Christmas Sneer

Holy Sugar Rush Batman! They’re at it again!

The Sinister Organization of Educators at the Christian school is becoming extremely adept in the art of illusion. I fear that at this rate I may be blindsided and fall from all power and control over my own children. Cleverly disguised as a cheerful Yule tide activity, the evil doers had the Kindergarten class create this monstrosity!

To the untrained eye this may appear to be a delightful gingerbread house decorated affectionately with frosting, candy canes, and Christmas cheer. If left alone, the quaint little house is a confectionery treasure of holiday mirth… But once consumed, the villainous scheme goes into action… And the unsuspecting parents are left to deal with the aftermath that can only be described as an explosion of uncontrollable hyperactivity! Followed by self-inflicted hair pulling and exasperated frustration on the part of the parents.

Unfortunately, this foul agenda has come back to bite them in the ass as these dark forces have met their match in the devilish department! I’m going to allow the five year old to devour the entire gingerbread abode for breakfast and then deliver the little lamb to the front doorstep of the school!

TAKE THAT!

Flashback Friday!

This Christmas Flashback Friday is dedicated to my grandmother (Oma). I have the coolest damn Oma in the whole world! She is the matriarch of the family and the root of all our absurdity. Oh yes… lunacy runs deep in this family. At some point during grade school my sister, Laurie, and I began decorating Oma’s house and Christmas tree for the season. Once the job was complete we were always rewarded with tea and cookies, which were usually accompanied by some amazing story from her long life. We would listen to her fabulous lifetime stories from her childhood, the war, or her journey to America with five children in tow. As time went on and lives changed, Laurie abandoned the Yule Tide duties but I carried on the tradition! On Saturday, December 6th, 2008 I kept my annual appointment with one of the greatest ladies in my world, and with the help of Travis, we brought her Christmas tree to life for another magical season. Gazing up at her beautiful tree that holds so many cheerful memories she thanked us with big hugs and kisses, and yes, we were offered tea and cookies. (Although this years story was about Buffalo wings and the fact that she finds the idea perfectly absurd because buffalos are entirely too big for those little wings! To which she laughed heartily at her own little joke…I told you she was a nut!) My Oma is 97 years old, and I told her that for as many Christmas’ that she is willing to give me… I will always be there to decorate her tree.

Me & Oma, December 06, 2008...

And Our Beautiful Tree...

Adventures In Dentistry!

Every six months I pack up the two youngest and we make our trip to the dentist for routine cleanings. Under normal circumstances I would never quite call it an adventure… but then again, Michael is getting older. (Insert ominous music here.)

Everything was going like clockwork…

Danielle had her teeth cleaned…

Michael was up next…




And then Mommy got into the chair...

Oh what a delicious time to misbehave! Mom in lock down with a steel tray holding her in, and sharp tools stuck in her mouth! I do believe Christmas had come early to the small devilish one. And then I hear Danielle exclaim, “Mikey! What are you doing!?!”

Trying desperately to escape from my stainless steel entrapment, I smacked my dentist in the forehead and sent the dental tools launching into the room. There was Michael, standing next to the dental chair, with the biggest shit-eating grin on his face. He was minus his pants and shoes.

“MICHAEL!”

Quickly Danielle, accompanied by the dental assistants, escorted the young exhibitionist back out to the waiting room to put on his pants and shoes. The story is that he had spilled some water on his pants while rinsing and was simply uncomfortable sitting in wet pants. (The boy makes a damn good point.) But initially when I asked him, “Why did you do that?” He simply responded,

“That’s what I do Baby… That’s what I do.”

I may have taken the insanity thing a little too far with this one.

I need a drink.

Tis The Season To Bribe Children

Miss Danielle comes home from school yesterday and declares that we NEED to log-on to kiisfm.com and vote for her teacher’s daughter, Isabella, who has been entered into The Cutest Baby Contest. She then proceeds to tell me that her teacher announced to the class that the children can earn Mrs. Tate dollars for every vote they get to be used at the classroom store!

So, let me get this straight… Just so Mommy fully understands… Your fifth grade teacher, at the Christian School, is bribing you to vote for her daughter? Well, hell! She’s got my vote! Any woman who manipulates a group of 10-11 year olds for her own personal gain has my utmost respect and admiration!

Actually, little Miss Isabella went through a major surgery this year, and had to have 1/3 of her intestine removed. It was a very emotional, very fearful time for these new parents, but fortunately the danger was caught in time, the surgery went extremely well and Izzy recovered beautifully!

So, whatever your reason to vote:

~ Help Danielle earn her bribe (this one works for me)
~ Heart felt story that deserves some Christmas cheer
~ Or just simply because she is a cute baby

Be sure to log-on and vote today for Isabella Tate!

1.) Go to kiisfm.com
2.) Type in keyword “baby
3.) Scroll down the page to the green box, click on the VOTE button underneath the “View Gr-Iz” box
4.) Mark the circle for #32 – that is her contestant number
5.) Enter your email address and click vote
6.) Validate the vote by opening up your email and clicking on the link provided

(To view her picture, go through steps 1-3 but instead of clicking the vote button select the “View Gr – Iz” button and scroll through the pictures… she is #32.)

Wordless Wednesday

Insanity Party of Five!

I pride myself on the fact that I have single-handedly made all of my children certifiably insane. I start the process when they’re infants and expand upon it more & more each year. And although the process with my husband has started much later in his life… I’m very pleased to say that he is making the transition to "The Dark Side" quite nicely, though at times he still tries to resist. INSANITY, PARTY OF FIVE!

So anyway, when one of my own demonstrates his/her insanity… It fills my little black heart with a world of pride and joy!

I asked our oldest, Brian, to send me a Christmas Wish List… This is what I received:

Brian’s X-Mas Wish

There is an explicit set of instructions which must be followed to find the desired board of choice.

1. Click here --> https://www.sector9.com/#/product/boards/

2. NOT HERE--> http://www.yahoo.com/

3. Once the Sector 9 website is open locate the (View by series) in the upper left hand corner underneath the (wheels) link.

4. Once located click the arrow to reveal a drop down menu. If you could not find the (View by series) tab repeat step 3.

5. Towards the bottom of this new drop down menu there is a (Sidewinder Series) option, go ahead and select the (Sidewinder Series) option. If you still can not find the (View by Series) tab, exit the website, turn off your computer, and walk away.

6. Once the (Sidewinders series) option has been clicked, three boards will appear on the screen. These are mystical boards which hold much power but only one is right for me, the other two are traps. If you chose the first board labeled, (Dawn Patrol) Garden gnomes will come steal your shoes. If you choose the second board labeled (Off the Wall 2) Minjas, (Midget Ninjas) will switch out the laundry when you are not looking so your darks will be washed with the whites. Assuming you like your shoes on your feet and your whites’ white, the final board is the correct selection. If you still have not walked away cuz you couldn’t find the (View by Series) tab, you are a horrible listener, and a failure in life. You should go and.... I don’t care what you do your not worth effort.

7. Once you have located the (Sand Wedge) board of amazingness, click.............the board, click the board.... STOP READING THIS AND CLICK THE BOARD!!!!..... If you have already clicked it in the previous step I am sorry for being so stern.

8. A window with statistics and pictures of the board will pop up and from here you can purchase or jot down information to see if you can find the board for a better price on another website.

Thank you and have a nice day :D

YUP! The boy is nuts! My work is done here.